Sunday, November 29, 2009

Religion, Facebook and Chickening Out

Hey guys,

Well haven't I had an interesting last few days! Firstly, remember how I said I was going to come out to my family over dinner. Well I didn't, I chickened out. Although I'm using the fact we all ended up going different places for dinner as a good excuse. I know I should of, but I got so terrified I just didn't.

So you know how I'm currently seeing C, well it's going alright, although I'm beginning to have my reservations as I've noticed some things in him that remind me far to much of F. So last night I went on a date with another guy D, who's a pretty alright guy, who I had a very fun time with, but thats for a different post. The point I'm trying to make is, I lead an actively homosexual lifestyle, and this doesn't sit very well with my religious friends.
I began coming out to them at the beginning of the year, and most of them were ok with it, under the assumption that I was gay but remaining single and celibate to please God. I humored them with that thought for a while. Now that I've begun telling them that I'm seeing people, they've suddenly become very anti gay, I've lost two of my best friends and I think I'm about to loose another.
This prompted me to post a status update on my Facebook

yes it's true... so stop asking me already! and no I don't care that you don't approve!

This made my brother message me asking what it was, because nobody tells him anything. So I took a deep breath, clicked my heels three times and took a leap of faith and told him. I knew he'd be ok with it all, but it was still a horrible and terrifying 10 minutes of waiting for him to reply. But I love my brother and I'm happy I told him.
Now all I have to do is tell my father, who I can guarantee wont take it nearly half as well as my brother.

Love all you guys heaps xoxo


3 comments:

Ron November 29, 2009 at 1:10 PM  

well congrats on telling your brother, takes courage. I still have to find mine. And sorry to hear about your friends.. but I guess like what people say, if they decide to cut their friendship with you just because of that, I suppose they weren't friends in the 1st place.

If you know your father won't take it well, why drives/motivates you to tell him? My parents are quite religious too and anti-gay, i don't intend to tell them anytime soon, if ever.

Octavius November 29, 2009 at 1:36 PM  

Good luck if you go ahead with it. I will say that it is better to clear the air, before you get caught, but in the end it is up to you. We are all here for you buddy, just let us know if you need anything.

What do you mean about C, is he trying to control you, or getting overly jealous or something?

All the best,

Octavius.

Lukas December 14, 2009 at 12:29 PM  

Coming out is always one of the hardest things we face as gay/les/bi teens.

I think the moment that we do, we feel weaker and more vulnerable than we ever have before. Which in many ways does happen, but you have to remember how much strength and courage it took for you to come out in the first place. You risk so much, you fear being judged by the people who love and care for you, but you do it anyway. That is real strength, it shows you are brave.

My father never took my coming out well either, but in time they will learn to live with it. He still hates it, after almost a year, but I know he loves me inside, and that helps me face my family each day.

I'm sure your father will come around eventually, if he loves you, he just needs to deal with it.

Remember, it's easier to change someones mindset, than it is to change a person.

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